Japanese funeral

Mr S is a member of Matsudo HC who lives in Ibaraki prefecture, about 2 hours away from Tokorozawa by car. Some time ago, a family member of Mr S passed away and we (L&C and us) were asked to help with the proceedings of the wake and the funeral. This is the first funeral in Japan that we are attending so we were quite apprehensive, but also a little intrigued by what we will see.

Japanese funerals are mainly buddhist in nature, and involves a great deal of ceremonies and rituals. It almost always involves a buddhist priest chanting in front of a huge wooden shrine with a photo of the deceased and lots of incense on it (Google 'japanese funeral' to see a typical shrine). This was the first Christian funeral the parlor handled, so they were understandably confounded. We asked for a screen to be placed in front of the shrine (see photo of Joy on the keyboard: you can catch a glimpse of it). We were also careful not to have any buddhist customs in the wake or funeral services

There is a strict dress code for funerals. For men, apart from the white shirt, everything else has to be black: suit, pants, shoes, and tie. For women too, black attire. The only jewelry allowed is the pearl necklace. We were practically sweating buckets in the hot summer heat. Everyone was extremely formal too. We had to take low bows and repeatedly say "よろしくお願いたします" (formal greeting) every time we bump into Mr S and his family.

The wake service went smoothly. Most of the people who attended were non-Christians, so it was a good opportunity to tell them about the love and hope that Jesus gives. The funeral and the cremation took place the following day. After the funeral service, cremation took less than 2 hours while we waited and had refreshments. After that, we all proceeded for mid-afternoon tea at a restaurant. At the restaurant, there was a suggestion to make a toast or sake offering to the deceased, but we declined.

With so many customs concerning Japanese funerals, it can be difficult even for a mature Japanese Christian to discern which ones are okay and which are contradictory to the bible. This seems to be the case especially when a country's culture is so closely tied to its religion. That day was our first Japanese funeral, and also an introduction into the perplexing world of death and the Japanese.